Fix Your Thoughts

Most of the time, I’m completely confident in the decision my husband and I recently made to move outside of the big city, to a small town, to raise our sons.

Periodically, though, I will have a moment of panic, wondering if we’re silly to uproot ourselves from where we have called home for most of our lives, and start anew.

Sometimes I’m completely comfortable with my physical appearance and being a size 12. Other times, I’m incredibly insecure about it.

Sometimes I have a good run of kind, gracious thoughts. Other times, after thinking something mean or ugly, I think I’m pretty much the worst person in the world.

Multiple times a day, I look at my sons and I am overwhelmed with love, and with joy about the fact that I get to be their mom. I am so thankful my difficult conceptions, pregnancies and complicated deliveries have led me to so much gratitude for even just having them, and the beauty in the simple everyday with them. I am completely okay with what we had to go through to get our boys here. But also, when I hear from other people stories of ease in the baby arena, I’m often envious. Envious because we didn’t get to experience it that way.

I love being a stay-at-home mom and consider now one of the best times of my life. But a few times a week, I have a moment where I think, “I’m exhausted. I can’t take care of anyone else or do anything else for one more second today. I literally have no more strength. When do I next get a couple of hours alone or out with friends?”

Until recently, I thought true wisdom and peace was almost never having conflicting thoughts and emotions; almost never having to deal with struggles of the heart and mind. But as the years have passed, I have realized I will never get to a point where I don’t struggle at least somewhat. Because I’m human.

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However, I have learned that I don’t have to dwell on the difficult. When I find myself dwelling on the painful, I pray and refocus my thoughts. I pray on the Scriptures that teach us about capturing our thoughts, casting our anxiety on him, and Christ taking our burden.

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Philippians 4:8 (NLT)

When you are struggling with your thoughts and emotions, take them to Christ in prayer. He is, as Scripture teaches us, our Wonderful Counselor, and it is He who makes us wise and gives us peace.

I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. John 14:27a (NLT)

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