Don’t Judge Me, Mom!

I read a Facebook status recently belonging to a celebrity who also happens to be a mom. She was kindly asking her followers to bug off. Apparently, some had quite a bit to say about her parenting choices.

With celebrities, I think we feel entitled to make judgements—not that it’s right at all. We feel like because we watch them all the time and are allowed to appraise their performances publicly that we can also appraise their lives the same way.

But we also appraise the lives of other moms around us, but maybe not so publicly. Our private appraisals can be pretty ugly.

But, moms, what makes us great moms is not in what we do — it has more to do with how we do it and why we do it.

I’ve been guilty. I’ve thought about the parenting moves others make and said to myself, “What in the world is she thinking?”

It humbled me recently as I thought about my new-mother sister-in-law asking me questions about what kind of water to put in baby’s bottle. My husband and I laughed at the answer.

“Well, with my first, I used distilled because that’s what they said to do. With the second, we used bottle water. And when the third came along five years later, we used the tap!” I told her.

Before you start balking at tap water and shaming me for not breast-feeding, you’re missing the point. The point is that even from one child to the next, I was a different mother. My first two were only a year apart, and I was a mom of littles — there were crafts, mommy-and-me activities, playdates, petting zoos, letter games, the works. With my third, I’m a mom of big girls and a little one — there is laundry, dusting, shopping trips, lunch dates, spectating at school events; she’s my best little buddy.

Their experiences will be so different, but none of them will be lacking.

Their experiences will be so different, but none of them will be lacking.

Moms love their kids in different ways, and good moms want their kids to be healthy, loving, well-mannered, productive, and happy. As long as it’s done with love, it’s all good in the motherhood!

Don't judge. With love, it's all good in the motherhood! #LifeasweLearnit Click To Tweet

motherhood love

Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins 1 Peter 4:8 NIV

Were you a different mom from one child to the next? Why do you think we judge each other as moms?

 

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4 Comments

  1. I was LITERALLY just thinking 2 days ago that my boys were raised in two entirely different households for their baby years (ages 0-2). 😀
    Something similar I shared awhile back:
    “First child: Fed homemade organic meals especially designed for toddlers that included ingredients to aide in brain development.
    Second child: Eats leftover pizza, on the floor, by the front door.”
    😉
    For the other question, I think the majority of judgment is rooted in our own insecurity. There’s so much uncertainty in parenting, whether we’re doing the right thing, and how everything is going to turn out, we feel insecure. When we judge, we then feel better about our own choices. When we have more confidence in who we are in Christ and confidence that He too is caring for kids, we relax, become less insecure, and judge less.

    • Sam Davis, Managing Editor Sam Davis, Managing Editor says:

      That makes me laugh so hard, Brittany! I love it. And I love your perspective on judgement. It makes so much sense that it comes out of insecurity. I’ll keep this wisdom in mind when I’m feeling judgy. Thanks for sharing!

      • Keep in mind that’s coming from the most insecure person on the PLANET! Easier said than done is the unfortunate reality. 😉
        (Also, I was my Mom’s third baby, and she’s told me countless times that I was her little buddy too. :-) ).

        • Sam Davis, Managing Editor Sam Davis, Managing Editor says:

          Aww, and look how wonderful a person you turned out to be! Mama’s li’l girls are awesome!

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